PMR Results -> Who Is Reza -> Projek Membantu Koleq -> Gambo Masa SRP -> Decadent BRU

More e-mails were generated in the last one week compared to the last 6 months altogether. The amount of bandwidth taken by these e-mails could have cost companies tones of money, and if IT personnel were around they could have detected an unusually high traffic of e-mails going to and fro.

Fortunately they were not around, as most other people around this time of the year. It’s holiday season every where, and I am not only talking about Europe or USA – offices in Malaysia were also so empty. So what did we do? We declared our unofficial holidays and jammed the days with e-mails.

The chain of e-mails started with the PMR results announcement, which proved to be a disaster for MCKK. To put things in perspective, a day school Sekolah Agama in Penang managed to produce 59 9As candidates, with more than 60s who scored 8As. And koleq – which supposedly group the top 100 brains at UPSR level, managed to produce a lack-lustre 56 8As.

They were a series of “soul searching”, what went wrong etc. (which had become an annual event). Some of the top suggestions of what went wrong:

Badut:
Aku rasakan koleq lately nie too focus on academic........what i meant is siang malam prep.....weekend prep......tak da masa utk this kids to relax...nielah jadinya...too much pressure to the students...remember they are just kids.......dulu kita sabtu ahad still boleh keluar town.......

Chibiok:
One of the reason koleq drop kow kow this year .... Jambu's population are decreasing tremendously, maybe sebab budak sekarang nie at young age dah start ada jerawat kot .... Not like Kama ...

Idzam Noor:
What happen? Kurang bersukan tapi result turun...

Otak tak cergas agaknya sebab tak cukup oksigen... camane nak terima ilmu dalam kelas.

Gadap:
Mungkin sebab tak de orang buat order nasi malam-malam, so bebudak skrg ni tak leh study malam. (Footnote 1)

But before that, the discussion digressed to a hot topic – “Who Is Reza”. Even people like Zahadin who has been generally silent in e-mail discussions sent two e-mails, enquiring the identity of one “Reza”. (Footnote 2)

The second guessing of “Who Is Reza” went all the way to the memories of those who left us in the early Prep School days.

Fadli:
Sorry to ask stupid question.. Siapa Reza Baharin ? Ritz ke ?

Zahadin:
haah.. aku pun nak tahu sapa Reza Baharin..
Ritz = Rizal

Reza = ??

he he..

Fadli:
ROugh,
since kau penjaga list batch dalam emailing list ni, silalah jawab siapakah gerangan Reza Baharin ?
aku sure bukan budak masuk and keluar F1 kan ?
Itu RAMZUZAMAN
jawab jangan tak jawab.

Pyan:
how about ali reza? the REAL E68 (sesapa rasa dia clone E68 be cool ok ;) who never turn up for registration on Jan 6 1990?
nama bapak dia bahrin ke? ke org lain?

Fadli:
Actually Piyan aku tengah nak duk ingat nama dia la..E68 tu..
aku tau dia bedmate Joe kan ?
nasib baik memory kau bagus..

ok so Reza Baharin = Ali Reza = Ramzuzaman = ??
siapa lagi nama Reza in our batch ?..tak de kan ?

Chibiok:
i think badut the best person to answer all this Reza issues here ... kan brother dia nama Reza ....tul tak badut

Chibiok:
guys,

reza tu sebenarnya nama samaran Rough .... saja nak mengaburi pihak lawan ...

Syam:
How about reza hatta?

Zaaba did clarify his identity, but that did not stop the digressing.

Zaaba (Class of 2000):
Subject hangat! Maaf jika menganggu ketenteraman anda semua lol.

I'd be most of your juniors by many many years. I was F5 in Koleq in 2000 where I was an anjing in the jambu farm popularly known as Prep School. I am not the youngest in Raf's list of emailed persons though as I spotted somebody who is in the class of 2003.

And its Reza bin Baharin and I bear no relation to Ali Reza of 1998 or Reza Rokman 1997. There is however a Mohd Reza Mohd Arif @ Kebau in my batch. If you do hear Raf make reference to a "Zaaba" that'll be me as well.

Chamat:
Dua2 pun salah - the original E68 was Remi Iskandar, who never came. Ali Reza was E90 before Ajak came in (Ajak is the current E90 kan)?

Fadli:
CHamat ???
kau simpan inventory list ke nama nama budak F1 yang tak 'melaporkan' diri ? how come u remember all these ?..syabas.

ada lagi orang nak recall nama budak budak F1 yang tak masuk langsung ? aku tau Badut punya nombor dobi ganti someone yang tak jadi masuk.. betul tak badut ? sebab tu kau tiba tiba sesat Rumah Ahmad sedangkan orang rumah ahmad kena ikut turutan:
E1 , E5 , E9 dan setiap 4 angka yang berikutnya.

sekian dimaklumkan.

Mpro:
Wah... Ali Reza masuk batch 9498....

Rough:
Aku rasa Fadli, as AJK Batch baru, dah tutup laaa topic ni Mpro.

Ali Reza ni curi umur kot, macam orang Kelantan zaman 50s & 60s dulu...

Bobo:
macam WAI dulu ker? aku dengar die tertukar birth cert adik die (meaning that patut2nye die 8993)

Pyan:
betul la chamat.. Ali reza sempat masuk french class kita dgn cikgu cina pompuan tua tu...apa nama ntah.. dia tu e90. Yang tak nampak muka, remi iskandar (no dobi yang ditagih badut....e68.)

Rahimi:
Pyan,

Remi Iskandar tue sekarang dah jadi best pren aku sebab sesama kat USM dulu.....Siap tinggal rumah sewa sekali tue..........

Gadap:
Ngko pernah adakan hubungan sejenis dengan Remi Iskandar tu tak?

Aiwa:
Weh.. jangan la kutuk2 orang kelantan.

Reza tu senior kita . Nama sebenar dia Razali Romeli. Abang angkat Raf.
WAI = Pyapong Pu On.

Jom la kita buat 9094 weekend. Aku nak main volleyball ngan Fadli. Tapi jangan main kat gelanggang simen. Aku takut kalau aku lompat and spike nanti, rosak simen Volleyball. Susah pulak Radin (kontraktor kelas A) nak baiki balik. Main beach volleyball pun ok gak. Boleh la Raf pakai G String. hehehe...

Fadli:
ku tak sangka selama ni Aiwa ingin tengok Rough pakai G-string. aku risau

After a while, Syam suggested that the discussion concentrated on ways to assist koleq in the future (which managed to stop the discussion from going into G-string, unlike the failed Fadli’s proclaimation earlier that the annual PMR result discussion was closed, exercising his self-proclaimed role as a self-elected AJK Batch).

Yet again, the discussion digressed (it’s hard to be in a dysfunctional batch, we could not even stick to a topic for longer than 3 e-mails).

Gadap:
Apa kata kita anjur program untuk bebudak koleq yang nak ambik SPM atau PMR????? Kita kan ramai pelajar bijak macam Fadli, Muta , Rough dll..... Mungkin 4 hari punya program pun dah ok kot.Tadi aku baru contact seorang oldboy dan dia sanggup bagi 'sponsor' untuk apa-apa program yang kita nak buat. Jumlah yang dia nak bagi tu boleh dikatakan 'unlimited'.Tapi sorang kena draf modul/kertas kerja + budget untuk tujuan nih......aku rsa Epit/Wong mesti pakar bab ni.So amacam semer.... apa kata kita gempur Kuala Kangsar ramai ramai..Bila lagi nak tabur kebijaksaan dan kepakaran kita kat generasi koleq yang baru nih...

Fadli:
HANG ON HANG ON GAPAPPP....

aku ok saje tapi ingat lagi ke kita Add Maths / Physics / CHemistry nak ajar bebudak tu ? sebagai AJK batch, berikut cadangan aku budak budak yang boleh bagi sikit tunjuk ajar:

Subject:
Bahasa Melayu - Rough Romeli
Bahasa Inggeris - Chamat Abdulah & Fazurin Jamaluddin
Add Maths - Fly Zakaria + Saiful Dzulfitri ( ini anak kesayangan Cikgu Mail ni...)
Chemistry - Tukid Arif
Pendidikan Agama Islam - Gadap Hussein
Prinsip Akaun - Badut Rashdi
Physics - Alan Majid
Modern Maths - Mpro Adzhar
Biology - Mutanizam Abdul Mubin
Sejarah - ini payah sikit sebab Gedebe dah sumpah batch kita...so siapa yang dapat A1 tu sila silalahhh..
Seni Perusahaan - Sumali Basuri
Pendidikan Seni / Lukis melukis / bu - Pica Othman
Kira kira akaun nak buat project - Epit Hasin & Wong Mahmud
Logistics - Chibix Rashidi & Abun Azizi
Maskot - Fadli Ramli & Aiwa Nor ( ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo )...

ada bantahan ?

Abon:
Slamba letak aku ngan chibix aje mascot........... rough and empro sambil mengajer still boleh jadi mascot

Chamat:
Baca pun x betul - harus diajar dgn budak2 koleq yg bakal diajar ke? kau bukan maskot, kau ajar logistics (if u can teach one this la kan, idea bernas fadli), fadli's suggesting dia dan aiwa jadi mascot

Chibiok:
Abon kau ni dah bangun ke belum or still having the fantasy about last nite.... Bukan kita la mascot tuuuu

KNO:
aku rasa mpro pakar art nih, bukan dia best student art masa srp 92 ker?

or aku yang silap.......

Fadli:
maskot tak leh ramai ramai... definasi maskot itu sendiri has to be unique and sikit..
so how ?
oklah abun.. aku tarik diri..kau jadi maskot dengan aiwa ok ?

Chamat:
Kenapa Bio Muta dan bukan Jita? Bukan based on his results he's qualified to be a doctor but he opted for engineering instead? Org2 lain x bleh bagi tunjuk ajar ke?

Fadli:
CHAMAT KAU MEMANG PINTAR !!!!! How can I have forgotten such a story ?

aku lupa akan kisah itu..

ok for the benefit of the other people in this mailing list, untuk pengetahuan kalian, masa kitorang Form 5 dulu and kena pilih apa subject nak buat for university,

Jita cakap lebih kurang macam nilah bunyinya " I want to do engineering but BASED ON MY RESULTS, i am qualified to be a doctor ".. so korang buatlah penakulan mantik sendiri sebab banyak sangat kesimpulan yang boleh dibuat..

so Jita, kau ajarlah Bio kalau kau rasa kau still terra... Madad jauh sangat....

Fly:
In my opinion, Fadli secara solo pun boleh cover semua... Nak ajar hose riding pun boleh dah... Tak termasuk facial treatment classes... Kau still buat facial treatment b4 each big day ker Fadli? Or iz it every day now eh?

Fadli:
oklah FLy

kalau kau insist aku ajar semua boleh..
tapi aku tak nak takbur..
so jadi maskot cukuplaaaaa...
barulah kau bersuara iz it ?

Syam:
Aku haram tak paham nak bagi consultation macam mana logistics ni? Maybe how to angkut nasi order malam2? Tapi kalau nak ajar yg ni, Aiwa, Wawan and mister omegatrend (azizudin) le yg paling layak....

Fadli:
KESIAN ABUN KENA BANTAI sebab baca email aku tak betul..
tak pe abun, kalau kau nak jadi maskot, aku undur diri...

tapi aku nak pegang Pelikat ( betulke ejaan ni ? ) korang ingat masa hari Keputeraan Sultan Perak , Band kena main berarak satu Pekan, budak F2 kena pegang pelikat "KOLEJ MELAYU".

is that the right word ?..PELIKAT ?

Chamat:
It's placard fadli. I'll need to include you in my 'class'. Unless la kau memang nak pegang pelikat kan hehe, sapa punya?

Fadli:
ok chamat, count me in the english class..

rupanya PLACARD is it ???
ni gang gang "Court Rangle" yang ghupa ghupany "Quadrangle" is it ?
so how ?
patutlah 1119 aku C3.

Fazurin:
bantahan aku: pend agama islam should go to orang orang yang dapat c3 ke bawah sahaja sebab makin besar angka maksudnya makin tinggi maqam orang itu, so I humbly suggest RAFIZI ROMELI dan/atau MADAD ABDUL RAHMAN to take care of the pendidikan agama islam subject.

Rough:
Having a field day ye.....
Aku dengan ini volunteer untuk ajar pendidikan islam.... aku sure budak2 semua zuhud macam aku dalam exam and dapat C & D semua....

Auzir:
Jangan kau "mengajar" certain people dalam bilik BRU dah le.

The next day (after tones of e-mail which didn’t quite get the consensus of what we wanted to do regarding our contribution to koleq), KNO sent the following photo taken in 1992 after our SRP, which snowballed into another round of chain e-mails.

KNO:
ni aku attachkan gambar masa kat koleq, gambar masa tgh watch emende ntah kat bilik sebelah surau kat prep school. aku tak sure gambar tu masa form 2 or form 3, yang for sure bukan form 1 coz we're not wearing short putih. anybody can confirm?

Fadli:
KNO,
wah lau !!...gambar mana kau dapat tu ?

I cant remember what that picture relates to..

3PK 1 - tak mungking kerana Cik Wan Mohd Khairi, Hamizie & Jita were SPU and not PK...also Che Tam was PK 2 not PK 1
Reading class Set A - tak mungking sebab aku rasa Hamizie Hamidon bukan Set A
so what the hell was that pic relating to ?

Rahimi:
Such a nostalgic pic....Actually tue masa kita semua form three....masa
kursus pengurusan jenazah selepas SRP.........................

Abon:
Ye ke........ takan harmizie duduk depan skali. Chetam pun boleh senyum............korang tengok cite lain nie kot....................

KNO:
kursus pengurusan jenazah? kenapa takde ustaz pun heh? power ah memory ko.............. saper punya camera heh? aku tak bawak kamera lagi masa tuh...........

Mattop:
Cuma ingat, lepas SRP, ada trip pergi kilang buat souvenir, lepas tu ada budak2 kita plak pandai2 amik souvenir... then semua yg pergi trip tue kena kumpul kat surau prep school, kena confess sapa yg amik, tapi si 'physcho' plak punya la nak kipas HM, dia suruh ngaku isap rokok skali... hahaha... mangkuk betul...

Fadli:
Mat Top
bila pulak kita pegi trip kilang souvenir ni ?
ni class kau je ke ?
aku tak ingat pun pegi trip apa apa lepas SRP

KNO:
masa tu bukan semua pegi kilang souvenir tuh, ada class yg pegi kat craft centre KK. ada ke yg pegi kilang kicpa tamin heh?

takkan ko tak ingat fadli ooooiiiii......

Rough:
Ehh how come aku tak ingat the surau part?
aku cuma ingat halizah nangis sebab dia yang organise semua tu...

KNO:
aku rasa bukan kat surau la....kat class je............yepppp cikgu haliza ngangis lepas that incident

Fadli:
aku still insist yang after SRP aku tak de pun join mana mana geng pegi lawatan sambil blajar ni..
Kicap Tamim ke souvenir ke haram aku ingat..
unless of course korang ada gambar tu trigger this memory back..

Muta:
Heh.... fadli... ko bkn lepas SRP terus bukak buku blajor add math ke?? Tu yg langsung tak de masa nak menziarah ke mana2 tuh : P

Fadli:
OK LAH OK LAHHH...

aku mengaku lepas SRP aku dengan Kiasunya terus pinjam buku Add Maths budak F5 masa tu and pulun tak ingat dunia.. then lepas 2 minggu suddenly realize yang syllabus KBSM lain...( aku rasa kita punya lagi susah dari Jeril & Sherap punya )..

so maybe sebab tu kut aku tak join lawatan sambil belajar semua tu..
so how ??
berbaloi ke'kiasu'an aku pada masa itu ?

Muta:
If memory serves me right... ada satu lagi group kiasu masa kita F5... bebudak sc 1 yg pi ambik prinsip akaun.... hmmm... entah la... kononnya nak break koleq punya SPM record... 11A1s incl 1119.... mmm... ring any bell???

KNO:
muhahahaha. ko nyer memory mmg power la muta. aku pun dah lupa pasal bebudak sc 1 yang amik akaun dulu. tu belum masuk case bebudak arab amik jepun dan bebudak french amik jepun lagi tu.........will the real bebudak jepun and bebudak arab please stand up!....... :-)

At the same time, there was a discourse on what really happened in BRU in 1994, with the so-called tales of coup de tat (Footnote 3).

Fadli:
Can I see a deja vu of kita pilih someone and then Rough gulingkan the candidate reminiscent of what happened in 1PK1 ? Agaknya sebab tu Badut tak berani ambil the post iz it ???

Fazurin:
Hahahahaha.

Speaking of coup d'etats/deja vus: and also remember the time when Azrin Madin was selected to be Presiden BRU but in the end Raf jugak yang jadi pres? ;) (though from what i understand Raf was quite innocent in this one (hmmm....ye ke?) and that Jures and Gadap - those inexorable powers behind thrones - that were the true masterminds)

Fadli:
Fazurin,
Betul ke Azrin Madin @ Musyek @ Suka baca alam perwira berselindungkan kitab, was selected as BRU PResident ? This one i never knew... Jures & Gadap care to comment ?

Talking about mastermind, teringat aku akan si NALE budak Leman that was self proclaimed as Mastermind Batch 92.. and he became Jures' idol masa kat 3PK1...

btw, apa yang dimastermindkan oleh si Nale tu ?

Fazurin:
musyek baca komik alam perwira berselindungkan kitab? i didn't know that.

re: nale - good question. apa pulak yang dimastermindkan oleh si Nale tu? masa f3 kat big school dulu idok la pulak aku merasa akan ke-mastermind-an dia. maybe dia tu dah terlalu mastermind sampai orang tak nampak apa yang dimastermindkan.

entah-entah this BRU coup d'etat story telah digembar-gemburkan oleh Jures to cement his reputation as a mastermind ala-ala Nale, macam tu?

Jures:
Hahaha. If I'm not mistaken (ingat2 lupa ni), Musyuk was the chosen candidate by the previous BRU. aka batch 93.

But, knowing that by having rough as BRU president, our chance to get the allocated "budget" from the school admin to fund our "activities" will increase tenfold since rough punye PR dengan cikgu cikgi amat bagus sekali.

Hence, kenapa musyuk digulingkan dari senarai calon. HAHAHAHA.

Fazurin:
hmmm...such lofty motivations... ye ke? or is it because korang tau that Raf would be too busy with the 657 other posts that he held that year that you and Gadap would have a freer hand in running BRU? (admit it!)

Wong:
Apa BRU dah buat…??? Apa budget from Admin…???

Fazurin:
Jures dan Gadap - the inexorable powers behind thrones - sila jawab.

Rough:
errr i think jures payah nak jawab, sebab dia sibuk main jambu kat dalam bilik kebal. gadap sibuk ambik order nasi branch pavi.

bru sembahyang tiap2 hari mintak tolong tolak bala (bukan Bala the top jambu)......

Suri:
boleh main jambu dalam bilik kebal meh? kalo aku tau bilik kebal ada multi function, sure aku buat satu kat prep school. boleh charge org2 big school dtg berjambu kat situ. sure aku boleh bataq kfc weekend (nite?)...

korang penah dgr cerita exco bru masuk kfc kuala ikut back door sebab main door dah tutup, sebab dah pukul 1030pm? mungkin fazurin buleh crite. tu pun salah satu job bru jugak tu...

KNO:
perghhhhhh tu dia dah meletup skandal BRU dulu................more please..... muhahahaaaaa

Rough:
macam mana laaa nak buat bilik kebal kat prep school? Bilik kebal tu ada kat surau big school je, sebab dia tak nampak bilik pun (and no mior, it's not the one dekat hargreaves hall where koleq simpan soalan exams..)

lagipun unfortunately budak2 jagaan kau agak laa kurang lawa ha ha ha, market masa tu f3 ha ha. so kalau kau buat pun aku rasa the business tak take off.

ha ha aku pernah ikut fazurin pi kfc back door pukul sebelas sekali, lalu kot rumah wawu. and sekali tu kitorang terserempak ngan budak2 ahmad (kadaque semua kot) baru balik tengok movie kat capitol.

koleq memang lawless in 1994 ha ha ha.

Suri:
kurang lawa? patut la fazurin prgi menjambu kat big school jer.. tinggal kan aku keseorangan kat sana. fazurin!!!! apa kurang nya aku???

kat prep school pun ader la bilik kebal ciptaan aku sendiri. bilik tu tempat aku membantaq balance ice cream yg di serve kat high tea. operation time: mid nite.

yg paling best pegi kfc lepas business hour ni, buleh dpt ration free. antara nya ice cream, zinger burger, ayam etc. aku ada gambo2 bukti ration2 free tu. pas tu ada staff yg agak bunny sket yg selalu supply free ration tu. yg tu, aku tak dak gambo.

memang betul laaa... bru 94 diselubungi skandal2 dlm koleq n luar koleq.

So there you are – one week in the life of a dysfunctional batch of MCKK products. Despite the same recycled jokes and the nonsense, the sense of belonging to a place called MCKK is so strong that even people who rarely write e-mail will, when it comes to a subject related to Malay College.

To the Class of 94, next year marks our 10th year on the internet (the first batch’s website was published by Jures in 1996, and has been maintained continuously in one form or another till this day). Keep the e-mails coming, they will prove priceless thirty years down the line.

Footnote 1

Syam:
Sebenarnya effective sgt ke study malam2 ni...buat bantut je tak cukup tido...pastu ada bnyk activity2 lain pulak tu yg lagi seronok di buat bila dah bgn malam2...bukannya nak study...tak gitu chibiok....

Chibiok:
Bab tu aku no comment, reserve for more serious issue.... Aku study la ... tak caya tanya Fadli and Epit ...dia org tu aku tak sure la buat kat dlm kelambu .... seems like study each other je ...

Footnote 2

The original e-mail on the PMR results was sent by Rough to many other people from the koleq circles, which included Sdr Reza Baharin of the Class of 2000. He responded to the e-mails and inadvertently wrote to the batch’s mailing list.

Zaaba:
Dear all,

IMHO, PMR is a bad measure of a person's true academic potential. As far as I can remember the PMR was an exam to certify that your brain could retain, memorize and regurtitate facts ad nauseum without ever needing to understand the big picture. FYI, a PMR pariah in my batch is now flying planes for MAS in Sabah (I hope he's not transporting RM1mio painting consignments though!).

Lets just hope the batch can buck up and fare much better at SPM level where the doors will really open for them to go places.

Footnote 3

BRU in 1994 was possibly the most “unlike BRU” of all the BRUs in the 90s. Proofs:

1) President BRU actually got C3 for Pendidikan Islam,
2) Some of its highest office bearers actually attended a New Year concert in 1994 instead of conducting the usual weekly usrah,
3) 50% of the F5 Excos spent less than 3 weeks combined in 1994 at surau, preferring to pray in dorms instead,
4) the President wore his trademark shorts and could often be spotted taking his shower in his short during azan for Maghrib;

But the biggest proof of all – you only need to see how they are now to judge the mishap back in 1994. In fact the BRUs from among the F4s staged a protest of the selection of office bearers in 1994, but to no avail.

PMR Results 2005

News that filtered from Kuala indicated that koleq only managed to get 56 8As for this year's PMR, compared to 60+ (2004), 100+ (2003) and 88 (2002).

There seems to be a declining trend - and it was lower than the early years of PMR when the no. was 90++ to 100++ all the time.

Only half of candidates obtained A for BM.

We just need to wait for more news to see how koleq fares against other schools, but expect uproars.

Aiwa’s Letter

Aiwa’s letter dominated discussion for the past one week, which kept on transforming from one topic to another, closely related. What started as Aiwa’s bashing turned out to be AJK Batch bashing – which just shows how much things have changed from the koleq days where AJK Batch had the big license to “lecture” their own batch members. But everyone took it in good sport.

See the thread here, you wonder how much money Malaysian employers lose every day to this kind of serial e-mails:

Mior:

Hahaha. I had a good read on Aiwa's infamous letter to Fadli. What a shocker (not the contents but rather who the $%ck still keeps such letter after more than 13 yrs!!). Is that the original version signed by (MN)2. Haha, hebat2, whomever the organisers who really dug deep to make the event a huge success. Congrats mate. Keep it up.

P.S: Lessons learned, better be careful on what u write. What you say might be forgotten (not in our batch's case), but what you wrote will haunt u as hard evidence, hahaha. I wonder how Rough got away with abundance of love letters dia to Ayai. Lucky I just wrote "selamat hari raya" to Hamz.

Aiwa:

hei mior, it was a long time ago story la.. heheheh

suatu masa dulu, kami memang rapat. masa inspection kat new hostel, fadli la yang lipat baju aku. macam ada orang rumah la pulak. hehehe.. tapi fadli terrer+nerd , aku tak terrer campur nakal. heheheh so, aku tak layak.heheh mana boleh pipit dengan enggang berterbangan together and forever...haahahhaahh

fadli, thanks for keeping our memories... and the killing letter as well.

Rough:

Mana pernah ada love letters laaa.... was careful enough even back then maaa... and unlike Auzir, I do remember apa aku buat.... tak de laa jerit kuat2 kutuk orang tengok2 kad dia..

Thank God kau just bagi "Selamat Hari Raya", kalau kau bagi love letters sure dah tut tut dah by now. At least sekarang only tut tut ha ha ha

Fadli:

Mior,

if u r questioning why aku simpan surat Aiwa setelah 13 tahun, ask no more..

as I have said previously, surat surat ( baik layang ataupun tidak ) yang ditujukan kepada saya semua nya elok elok je dalam file.. cuma aku tak bind je lagi.. itulah the best source for "99 dalil kenapa Fadli tak boleh jadi ......"

so how ?...aku rasa kita kena pegi ransack rumah Rough and cari dia punya surat surat lama.. I am sure rough punya collection pun tka kurang hebatnya..

BOBO, kau amacam ? scanlah surat surat mu..

Fazurin:

tak payah ransack rumah rough. banyak incriminating evidence ada kat aku. tu tak campur oral testimonies of quotable quotes at batch meeting masa F2 lagi tu.

Mior:

Oo.. ko pun AJK batch ye Fazurin. Idok le teman tau. Undercover punya ker or biro agama? How was the election & selection process in F2? One thing for sure, the bogus election we had in F1 to select our AJK batch really taught us how a fair and just election can't never be achieved in Msia's environment, hah!

I wonder what basic criterion that Puyeng, Jeril, Chomang, Shrap & ID deemed sufficient for an AJK batch to possess back then. Was it suara macho cum maturity e.g. Ameba, or was it physical attributes e.g Zahadin, or good looks e.g. can't remember who, rebellious & outspoken e.g Rough or all of the above e.g. Toy aka Araza.

Rough:

Ha ha sampai hati banyak2 criteria kau bubuh aku rebellious & outspoken je? Bubuh laa jambu ke, pandai ke, gheti tiup ke......

Fazurin was not AJK Batch, but he has this strange habit of jotting down what AJK Batch did say in meetings - in view of blackmailing them in the future...

Kau punya compilation of the speeches dah siap ke Fazurin?

Fadli:

Fazurin,

bagi example of some quotable quotes from F2 Batch meeting ?

btw, lama siut aku tak dengar pasal Batch meeting ... what was the purpose of kita ada batch meeting dulu ? aku ingat masa F2 kita lantik ADDITIONAL batch punya committee members..contohnya Pejal..

apa lagi huh ? my memory is failing me

Fadli:

aku sering tertanya tanya, apsal korang tak pilih aku jadi AJK Batch huh ? aku gila teringin masa tu tapi HARAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...

to quote Mior, semua yang jadi MACHO MACHO belaka.... Macho ke Rough ?.. Macho kuttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt

btw siapa tau akan apa jadi to Khafiz Mat Noh @ Tok Guru @ tak pernah masuk class in F4 tau tau dah hilang masa F5 ?

Rough:

Kau boleh tak entertain frustation kau tak jadi AJK Batch without melibatkan aku?

Anyway, aku rasa kau tak terpilih sebab kau pernah kena lempang ngan ID sebab mintak dia batalkan confinement kau.. ha ha I give you point for the guts to ask ID, kau ingat kau manja2 ngan dia dia nak kasi laa ha ha, sebab tu aku rasa record kau straight blackened out...

Alaaaa Fadli buat2 tak tahu pasal Khafiz, padahal deskmate dia..... we all sependapat in sc 1 that in order to get rid of competition, kau poisoned his mind sampai dia blah koleq. Lepas tu tak de challenger dah le for top student.....

Mengaku je laa Fadli...

Chamat:

Kita lantik kau utk ajk batch sekarang la fadli, amacam?

Apart from pejal, hairul & kalai pun dilantik as ajk batch members jugak kan masa form 2. Mungkin selection criteria masa form 2 lebih complex kot hehehe

Fadli:

chamat,
macam mana kau boleh ingat hairul and kalai dilantik masa F2 ? very the good memory iz it ?

Wong:

Sama case mcm kau gak kot Fadli...frust..tak terlantik...

Chamat:

i think they were responsible for really weird areas - ajk keselamatan and stuff like that. kau rasa selamat ke fadli masa form 2? Hehe

Fadli:

to answer u Chamat,

Di atas "Protection" dari AJK Keselamatan ( ie Hairul, Pejal, Kalai & Faz (??) ) aku rasa hidup aku di F2 lah yang paling aman tenteram...

Campur pulak protection dari bedmate aku ie AIWA @ (MN) kuasa 2, everytime aku berjalan dari NH via Big School to our class memang aku langsung tak pernah kena tegur or kacau..

well done lads...thinking back, aku rasa AJK batch banyak berjasa kepada batch.

"Ke arah keunggulan dan kesejahteraan"

Rough:

ha ha selection criteria masa f2 tu pun aku tak tahu.... tapi as salah seorang yg paling suka buat benda2 mengarut ni - it's more of the philosophy "if you can't change them let them join you", plus niat nak redress the so-called rigged election ha ha ha

tapi haram apa jadi - nasib baik pejal buat the famous speech on Berkat...... sampai bila2 he is remembered as AJK batch....

Nanti laa next reunion, kita buat election AJK batch baru nak? After all Bala pun dah jadi top jambu from last reunion...

Fadli:

HANG ON HANG ON !!!!
Suddenly my memory has come back to me...

Korang ingat tak masa F5 punya election for AJK House (ie pilih House President + AJK nya ) aku tersangatlah ingat yang MUTANIZAM ABDUL MUBIN was elected AJK for Pendidikan for Rumah Leman!!!

How ??....that was the first time in history yang House pilih a specific AJK untuk mendidik anak anak buahnya...

so persoalannya, to all those Lemanians, korang rasa "terdidik" ke di bawah naungan Mutanizam Abdul Mubin?

Muta,
I know u r in this mailing list...cerita sikit apa projek projek kau untuk mendidik budak budak Leman ?

Bukan rumah Idris pun ada pilih somoeone like that ke ?

sekali lagi aku frust, sebab Ahmad House tak de pun lantik AJK Pendidikan..

so how ?????

Chamat:

Ntah. All i know is that ajk batch mcm separuh dr batch je. Tiap kali batch meeting kat dlm dining hall yg bukan dining hall tu, separuh dr batch kat high table yg bukan high table tu.

Apa lagi ajk2 yg ada ya? Ada ajk railing x? Aku rasa macam ada je.

AJK pendidikan? How come i have no recollection of this? U sure u not making this up?

Mungkin ahmad x perlu ajk pendidikan kot, semua terdidik mcm kau hehe

Muta:

Errkk.... ye ke? Bila masa ni? Siyus nya tak ingat... aku dlm house committee ke dulu?? Honestly, yg ni aku btoi2 tak ingat... tapi aku still ingat aku dulu pres French Club masa F5 :-)

Wong:

I thought AJK railing suppose kena kutip 'boy london'..??

Form 2 ... to create konon-konon The New Generation (TNG)...TNGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! (those who could recall... sound effect kena tembak from over floor frm Tom & geng ) masa tu la Rough kamcing dengan Reza Hatta...

Tu jer la yg aku ingat AJK batch buat... similar mcm Malaysia's government.. 'ayam berkokok riuh sekampung'..buatnyer ...idok...

Fazurin:

what a pandora's box i have opened here. (evil laugh)

a sampling of quotable quotes from batch meetings by ajk batch kita:

"Berkat tu nama aje Berkat, tapi Cina punya tau tak? Orang Melayu jugak yang pegi Berkat tolong mengayakan orang Cina" - the famous Berkat speech by Pejal.

"Bahagian kulit pada kemaluan lelaki tu adalah bahagian paling sensitive sekali pada badan manusia. Sabun pulak mengandungi alkali. Jadi kalau korang caleng selalu nanti sensitiviti kulit kemaluan korang akan hilang." a speech on the deleterious effects of caleng by the inimitable Tok Guru. (comment: obvious pitfall in this argument is of course, kalau caleng tak guna sabun e.g. minyak zaitun ke, should be ok innit?)

"Korang dok selalu nyanyi lagu wind of change tu, korang cuba hayati sikit words dia. lagu tu kata "we could be so close like brothers". Like brothers tau tak" - the opening speech at the inaugural f2 batch meeting by no other than our president toy.

Quotable quotes by RAF comes at a premium. Please contact me separately to negotiate the terms.

Dan aku dengan rasminya mengisytiharkan bahawa aku MAKSUM daripada menjadi AJK batch.

Wong:


2nd quote really buat aku gelak gila..sampai org ingat aku giler duk gelak sorang-sorang !!..mangkuk..

Now we have sabun Johnson&Johnson.. facial cleaner pH 7... so no longer alkali ..boleh la pakai buat caleng... !!!

Fadli:

ok aku tak ingat sangat quote quote AJK batch.. tapi tiba tiba teringat..

" Kamu gunting rambut pendek pendek tu macam BUAH BACANG DIKULUM BABI".....by the famous Gedebe..

Persoalannya sekarang:

1) Buah bacang tu apa ?
2) Babi boleh kulum iz it ?
3) Babi makan ke buah bacang ?
4) Buah bacang tu ada rambut ke ?
4) Kat mana Gedebe pernah lihat Babi mengulum buah bacang ?

Wong:

Babi adalah merujuk kepada sinonim batch tahun genap yang juga dikenali sebagai batch kampung..ini adalah kerana hanya babi yang biasanya dapat dijumpai di kampung-kampung dan secara kebetulan dikampung-kampung terdapat banyak pokok bacang yang secara tidak langsung boleh dikulum
oleh sang babi.

Manakala 'batch 9094' dikatagorikan sebagai batch Beruk dan Bandar (BB = not BB Ice cream ) oleh kerana banyaknya beruk-beruk yang berkeliaran di Bandar-bandar besar seperti di botanical garden penang.......Namun apa yang mampu 'dikulum' oleh beruk tidaklah diketahui...

Fadli:

WONG SILAP !!!!
BABI BUKAN TAHUN GENAP, TAPI TAHUN GANJIL...

TAHUN GENAP ITU ADALAH BATCH YANG SEDARKAN DIRINYA ITU "BANDAR" OLEH ITU AHLI AHLINYA ADALAH "BERUK @ BABOON @ KONGKANG @ KING KONG"

SEKIAN PEMBETULAN

So to any present boys reading this, if you fancy a post as AJK Batch, my advice is to think twice. If you are terlajak and are already an AJK Batch, then for God sake please choose your words carefully as it will haunt you. To those who are not AJK Batch, start jotting down all your AJK Batch’s antics now, it can prove financially fruitful in the future.

As for Fazurin, I make it my life mission to expose his writing in NurIslam when he was the Chief of Syukbah Penerbitan of BRU in koleq and the chief propagandist back then ..... muahahaha (even more evil laugh).

And So It Begins ... (again)

The coaches for koleq's debating teams are meeting tonight to mark the start of the next debating season - with planning for the camping workshop and preparation timetable for 2006.

We are expecting quite a full quorum tonight, with both the Camping Masters group (Wong, Badut and Gadap) and the coaches group (Shahrol, Canoe, Allen, Izrin, Budu, Zaaba and Izzat) attending. Ben, Dany, Rizal and Faiz may come if they can make it - but they usually leave the task of drilling and torturing the kids to us, before they come for the tournament itself.

At the very least, there will be 6 debating tournaments that these boys have to participate, and on their shoulders rest our expectation that they will do justice to MCKK's debating heritage.

It's a mixed feeling to go through this all over again, as the last season was such a let down, against a backdrop of poor adjudicating qualities and prejudice. The only comfort that most of us the coaches took was the hope that the kids would have learnt something from the debating rooms that couldn't be taught formally in classes.

This was my note to all the coaches way back in June to mark an abrupt end to last season, hopefully my thank you note for the next season will be less melancholic:

Dear all

I am sorry for taking this long for something as simple as saying thank you. A lot of reasons (yada yada yada), but mostly I did not want to revisit the issue too soon after such a disappointing season.

I cannot thank all of you enough, especially those who form the backbone of the support group who have been with me since September 2003 on this. I don't even know my motive anymore as I am not really a nostalgic person who goes on and on about Malay College, but I know a lot of you did it for the right reason.

To those who were willing to stick through to honour your friendship with me although you don't see any impetus whatsoever to keep doing this, I personally owe you a great debt. It's this kind of friendship that makes us collegians special.

To those who have the welfare and the benefit of the kids at heart all the time, only Allah can repay you. The good deeds that we invest in other people's children, Insya Allah will be repaid through the good deeds that other people will invest in our children (in the future) - I have always believed this.

There are some of you who were never a debater back then but gave commitments more than what even former debaters have shown - I wish you yourselves were debaters back in college and things would have been a lot different.

I wish we could have won so that I can retire in peace and they can get rid of my ghost - but sometimes there are things beyond our control. The team was really good and I know they were a lot better than all the schools in PPM since we have seen all these schools at UIA, but it's rarely a question of ability and mental capacity, lest Ben and Dany would definitely have won PPM in 1990.

We can only hope that the kids are inspired by the efforts and tribulations we go through to push them to win PPM, so that they grow up to continue this small tradition that we have among debaters. I don't belong much to anything in this world, but I identified all that I am, that I was and that I will be with the training I received as an MCKK debater and the pride I hold as a debater - I hope they feel the same way, with or without the trophy.

Already the juniors are picking up things very quickly - the kids are up in arms again already plotting for next year's season. Plans are under way and their determination touches me. It's a good cycle - they want to win so badly to repay what we have done, we will keep doing this hopefully because we are touched by these energetic and determined boys. In the end - with or without the trophies - hopefully they leave MCKK a much better person worthy of the debaters' badge they wear, for sometimes it is not winning the championships that make our efforts worthwhile, it is seeing the change in their attitude, determination, knowledge and maturity that is priceless.

I don't know how long I can continue this, but it will be a time when my generation (the mid 90s generation) will have to pass the baton to the next generation. The early 90s generation delivered us 4 finalists and 2 PPMs, we hope to match if not to surpass that contribution. However, it is also important for the next generation of would be coaches (the late 90s) to start from now and put in the commitment that your predecessors have shown - the bond must not be broken, because it is very difficult to start from scratch just like we did in 2003.

Again I cannot thank you enough for the valuable support and contribution - from the usual suspects of the original coaches in 2003/04 (Ben, Dany, Rizal, Shahrol, Fazurin, Sani and Izrin), to the return to the fold of Faisal, Faiz, Kechoque and Chamat, to the addition of Allen, Canoe, Wong and Badut, to the new batch of junior coaches of Izzat, Zharif, Pojue and Afiq.

Maybe one day we will win PPM again and I can finally retire, although for the time being efforts just need to be doubled if we were to win PPM.

In my prayers I pray for your prosperity and for Allah to repay your good deeds, as well as that of the kids'.

Reunion Dinner Photos

The photos are being uploaded and collected. I have uploaded mine, Fadli will upload his tonight (so he promised) and I am picking the official photos from the pro cameraman Radin maybe tomorrow night. Others had committed to upload (apart from Mpro who has to cuci dulu then scan ha ha) but my guess is it will trickle.

I do intend to write on the reunion dinner, but have not had the time. Now we have to move onto organising and planning for next year's debating team's preparation, that will take quite a lot of our time, so maybe the story would have to come later.

But Aiwa's letter was classic, and for that I have to share it with everyone here.

For more photos, please visit Batch's Fotopages.

Back To School: Review Part I

The discussion on HSE KPIs spilled over from yesterday, until it was killed off prematurely by Chamat and digressed onto the reunion review:

Chamat:

Sebab xde kerja, suma org (or maybe it's just me?) pun pening baca pasal LTA/LTI yg berjela-jela. Gimme you boss' number and I'll call him back to the office for you so that aku x pening baca karangan2 pasal LTA/LTI.

Bitching aside, I'd like to thank the organisers for organising a great reunion dinner last weekend. It was a very enjoyable evening. Let's just not 'invite' MCOBA recruitment officers the next time around ya.

Oh, we might want to improve on the random number generator too :-)

Rough:

I will forward the complaints on random number generator to Bill Gates himself, for embarassing me so much that night.

As for the MCOBA recruitment officer, unfortunately he invited himself - but at least he did not try chat up lines with you Chamat *wink wink*

Mior:

Aiseh, looks like ppl lime me missed a lot. What's this Bill Gates's number generator & recruitment officer and all. Sapa2 lagi yg takde kerja today, mehla story sikit in details. Pictures won't speak a thousand words.

Fadli:

My beloved friends & brothers,

especially to the organizers, thanks for the efforts for gathering a bunch of long lost friends for a lovely night cum dinner cum reunion session... it was nice to jumpa korang semua after bertahun tahun lamanya....

For those of you who missed it, these were some of the highlights of the night:

- Rough kept to his words and wore his F1 white shorts despite the fact that peha dia dah 4 kali besar + dia lupa wax kaki dia yang berbulu...

- Badut still dengan dia punya samping purple Rashdi Ramlan and pakai labuhnya sampai ke bawah lutut.....abis gangsta lah tu badut !.....Chibiuk pakai full attire koleq...tapi as usual, perut dan bontot ada banyak kali ganda sekarang ni..

- Fido boleh muat lagi baju batik Dato Hassan Hashim yang kitorang kena pakai masa balik rumah......aku still tah faham macam mana kau muat lagi baju tu Fido...kau sure tak antar alter kat tailor mana mana..

- Bala was nominated, voted & selected uninamously as TOP JAMBU of the night.... FYI, aku duduk satu meja dengan Bala & Pica and I can assure u all, joke joke semua still era 94...tak berubah langsung.....meja kitorang gelak separuh mati tapi kalau orang luar dengar joke tu, sure tak faham punya...ala ala Alam Perwira punya era..

- Peah & Toy buat aksi ranjang dalam video 1994 yang Awi ambil di koleq...make sure korang tak masuk politics sebab aksi tu memang censored.

- Kalai punya kejuean and energy has not diminished over the years.... we watched the video yang Awie ambik masa F5 dulu and compare dengan "telatah serta tingkah lakunya" masa malam tu, memang tak berubah langsung.....well done kalai...

- Lutfi.... for just being there & Effendi for flying all the way from Kuching.

- Pok Peq for not being there... kitorang ingat dia nak buat last grand entrance but it never happened. So tak terubatlah rindu kitorang nak jumpa saudara afifi.

- Cabutan lucky draw guna Microsoft random generator...aku rasa nenek aku buat lagi RANDOM! ....konon kononnya Rough nak buat gempaq & hi-tech dia guna software untuk keluarkan nombor bertuah tapi at the end nombor yang sama keluar 23454 kali..... and yang paling musykil, 4 orang organizers dapat hadiah !... aku kurang yakin dengan integrity sofrware tu.

- Badut putting up a slide show on "business card" masa kita Form 1 dulu and then kitorang kena teka siapa yang empunya business card tu based on the "kata kata bell dalam card tu"...the usual suspects were : "Kiss me when we meet" - Noradli Parsada, "On and onwards" - Afifi Ahmad and then when it came to one card, Auzir Zakri dengan machonya cakap "siapalah hantu hantu yang buat kad macam ni dulu...aku tak pernah buat!".. then jeng jeng, tengok tengok nama yang keluar AUZIR ZAKRI..... at that moment, dia hilang KEMALUANNYA sebentar and Bala bangun hentam dia..

- Rough putting on in the slide show a letter that someone wrote to me masa kitorang F2 dulu and suruh orang teka... belum orang nak teka, AIWA cepat cepat bangun and mengaku yang dia PENULIS surat tersebut.... actually aku ada lagi surat lain yang lebih "menarik" dari tu but I will keep it for our 15, 20, 30 years batch reunion.... in fact aku rasa aku kena start tulis buku about it.. amongst the things yang Aiwa tulis dalam surat tu "Fadli, Next year kalaulah ditakdirkan SAYA masuk 3 PK 1, bolehlah kita jadi deskmate ye! Boleh lah kita study SAMA SAMA. Dulu bedmate nanti deskmate. Dulu, waktu kita jadi bedmate, satu NH tau. GLAMERLAH jugak!"

that was just the gist of it...as u guys might recall, Aiwa did not make it to 3PK1, KNO became my deskmate and hence aku tak dapat study SAMA SAMA bersama AIWA...sedih nya tak terkata...

ok I think I have written enough...

once again, to the organizers Epit, Rough, Badut, Zadin, Idzam Noor, Awie, Radin, Abon and all those who attended, thanks a lot!... it was worth my trip back home..

Aku actually tengah packing kat rumah ni sebab my flight back to Melbourne is at 8pm tonight.... but I had to write this email before I leave.

Mior, RUGI HANG TAK MAI !!!... Aku ada kutip payung Class of 94 untuk kau...

BTW, I will upload my pics in the koleq blog nanti...

Have a great week guys and hope to see you guys some time soon.

take care & salam,
E 53 (aku tengah cari kad aku buat masa F1 so that I can know apa ucapan bell yang aku included in that)...

LTA/LTI In Koleq Terms

Still fresh from the reunion dinner last weekend (of which I will write later once all of us recuperate), even definition of LTA/LTI (if you are not in technical lines don't bother) was given in koleq's terminology:

Chibik:

Kengkawan,

Anybody here can explain me what's the difference between LTA and LTI? How this thing works in HSE department? Please...

Wong:

Ha..ha... beza LTA & LTI mcm beza karipap and nasi lemak kat dining hall... both meant for bataq...but one is on Tuesday masa snack (which normally Science 5 yg bolot) lagi satu masa Jumaat breakfast...(which biasanya Bocap kebas sambal banyak gila....) and coincident plak..Bocap science 5...!!

So same mcm LTA & LTI..both are HSE KPI..but the only different is LTA (Lost Time Accident) and LTI ( Lost Time Incident ).... both phrases which normally people thought interchangeable actually not at least in HSE...la..

Incidents - unplanned event or chain of event which HAS or COULD have caused injury or illness or damage to property or environment or combination of these... ( e.g. sum of fatalities, Permanent Disabilities, Permanent Partial Disabilities and Lost Workday Cases )

Accidents - unplanned event or chain which HAS caused..bla..bla..bla..mcm atas la...

So the main different... Incidents includes 'Near Miss'..while accident not...

So in modern HSE practice.. those who calculate LTA.. normally 'bell' skit mcm those yang pakai spek F1 kat slides presentation masa dinner .... skit..as nowadays people are calculating LTI instead of LTA..pasal no point kalau nak calculate those dah berlaku jer..without instilling preventive culture...then normally masa calculate nak rationalize that..they come out with frequency..call LTIF ( Lost Time Incident Frequency)..formula.. (LTI/Exposure hours) x 200,000 or LTI/Exposure hours) x 1,000,000 ..depending on mazhab mana dia pakai.....US ker UK...

But in case of Muta patah tangan dulu..aku pung tak dapat classified apa..pasal aku tengok bataq pung makin banyak..and kalu ada award bataq masa dinner arie...aku sure Muta menang...!!

Wan Azman bin Wan Mahmud
Central Asia QHSSE Manager*
(Quality, Health, Safety, Security, Environment)

PS

* Nasib baik qualified HSE Manager and job scope covered a quarter of the world, kalau tak haram aku percaya

** Reunion dinner was a blast, but am too buried with office work to write. Need to gather all the photos first anyway