Blank

"Alrite then, jus make sure u don't do anythg i wudn't do heh heh & know tht u hv lotsa frenz around u who wud always b there 2 support u, no matter wht :)"

Chamat and I concluded last 2 weeks that mid-life crisis takes place earlier in our generation.

It's at our age.

The intensity and speed of everything means we move faster, age quicker and die younger. If it takes people of previous generation an age of 40 to begin evaluating their life, ours knock on our door at mid 30s.

It is here.

Can't sleep, can't think, can't focus. Trapped within, surrounded outside, it's suffocating.

Every night I watch the clock ticks away and pray that the tireness will bring me to sleep; but it's a vicious cycle because it's that tireness you need to go to sleep, that saps away the energy from you when you wake up next.

And I am watching the clock ticks away now - the body ages so much lately; but the eyes just do not want to close. How do you manage such a disobedient pair of eyes?

Keep on sending the emails to the Male-ing List - as Joe reminded me this week; it may save our life. The laughter and smile you get each day from the senseless and purposeless emails spamming our mailbox is the very thing that keeps your heart pumping.

I hate this cycle. It costs so much to get out, it eats too much inside, it changes you beyond repair by the time you walk at the other end. A bit more and we are through. Just hang on while we walk this through.

POSTSCRIPT

Jita has always been there at the time when I come to this part of the cycle. He always reminds me not to do things he wouldn't.

Which means there's pretty nothing that I cannot do, because he does not have that much boundary. Ha ha.

And I still cannot sleep. And Malaysia does not sell sleeping pills on shelf just like in the UK!